I need your vote for the 2018 Grabby Awards!

:  Please vote for me for “Hottest Body” at the 2018 Grabby Awards! Here’s the voting form (alternate link here):

The 2018 Grabby Award nominations are out, and I’m honored and humbled to be nominated for FOUR awards:

  • Performer of the Year
  • Best Versatile Performer
  • Hottest Rimming* (with Steve Roman in “Muscle Daddies”)
  • Hottest Body

And my hubby Dirk has also been nominated for Best Flip Scene in “Cum Laude” with Jackson Grant!

This year’s Grabby Awards is a bit different, in that YOU get to vote in the “Hottest Body” category! The competition is fierce, but I would really appreciate your vote, which you can cast at the top of this page. I’m one of the oldest guys on the list — I’ll be nearly 45 by late May, when the Grabbys are held — and wouldn’t it be cool if this “old dude” were to win? Anyway, I’ll leave it up to you guys… there’s plenty of amazing looking guys on the list, especially my good friends Jason Vario and Liam Knox… but if you wanna vote for me that would be awesome!

The Grabby Awards are being held on May 26 in Chicago. The show is open to the public; you can buy tickets here.

* For those of you who aren’t familiar with rimming (also known as “anilingus”), here’s the Wikipedia article on the subject. I hear the Grabby award comes with a toothbrush and a bottle of mouthwash.

The president, the porn star, and why that matters


There’s something particularly captivating about news stories involving porn stars. Sadly, many people regard adult film professionals with scorn, dismissing them as stupid at best and degenerate at worst. So when a major story about a porn star breaks, those same people tune in, eager to scoff at the amusing notion of a porn star actually being “relevant.” In that vein, I couldn’t help but notice a touch of amusement in the voices of the cable news talking heads when the story of Stormy Daniels’ lawsuit against Donald Trump first surfaced. The lilt soon faded, however, as the details of the saga started to sink in — evidence of an orchestrated cover-up, allegations of criminal wrongdoing by Trump’s lawyer, a possibility that Trump may be required to testify under oath — and pundits started taking the story a little more seriously.

“The President and the Porn Star” is the go-to headline that the media has chosen to herald the affair and its ongoing legal fallout. I have mixed, but mostly positive, feelings about the use of that particular screamer. Reducing the story to a cute turn of phrase that sounds more like the title of a tawdry fairy tale than a serious news story lends an air of salaciousness to the saga, but I would argue that the salaciousness is key to the story’s impact.

The “mixed” part of my feelings stems from the fact that the nature of the story emboldens the people who like to spit on porn stars. A mere glance at Twitter — search “Stormy Daniels whore” if you dare — will give you an idea of the horrible things that people are saying about her. Stormy, for her part, is handling it brilliantly. Here’s how she addressed the criticism in a recent interview with CNN:

openquoteI’ve been in the adult business for 17 years, so to make it that long in that business you have to have a really tough skin, and so most of it rolls off my shoulders because it’s an opinion. Like, oh, you think I’m a whore, or you think I’m ugly, or I’m old, or I’m fat or my boobs are too big or too small or whatever. There’s nothing along those lines that someone can say to me that I haven’t heard. And so when someone says, “Hey, you’re a whore…” I’m like, “That is ‘successful whore’ to you!”

Now that’s class. As a porn actor myself, I have to say I’m very proud of her. She’s giving successful whores a good name!

Now, if this had just been a case of Donald Trump having an affair with a random woman, the world would have issued a collective shrug and said “that’s just Trump being Trump.” (Morals be damned… his base has already forgiven him for sexually assaulting women, so what’s a little affair between friends?) But it’s the catchy headlines and late night one-liners that have given this story life, and the tawdry nature of having an affair with a porn star — the horror! — is what sustains this story as front page news. Trump’s followers are degrading her, Trump-haters are cheering her, and everyone has grabbed their popcorn. Sex sells, as they say, and the adage holds true in the news media as well. But because it sells, and because this story has stayed in the news, it has led us from the comparatively simple story of “President Once Had an Affair” to revelations of potential campaign finance violations and other criminal acts in an attempt to cover it up.

As is so often the case, the cover-up is far worse than the crime. In addition to the fact that the hush money Trump’s lawyer paid to Ms. Daniels is raising legal questions in its own right — campaign finance violations carry significant jail time — in a political sense the continuing scandal could wind up being very damaging not just for the president, for the entire GOP. Republicans impeached Bill Clinton for attempting to cover up an affair, after all; imagine the hypocrisy should they let their guy slide for doing the same. (Oh, the optics!) That’s a great way to turn off the all-important swing vote, not just in the presidential election but all the way down the ticket.

And none of this would have come to light if not for “The President and the Porn Star.”

Happy 2018 International Women’s Day!

Happy International Women’s Day! The holiday, which has been observed since 1908, is a global celebration of women everywhere, their achievements, and the strides that nations and cultures the world over have made towards equality for women. This year’s theme is “Time is Now: Rural and Urban Activists Transforming Women’s Lives”, which is particularly appropriate in this age of #MeToo and #TimesUp. In the spirit of the holiday, I just want to take a moment to wish all you wonderful ladies out there a huge thank you for all the support you’ve given me and Dirk over the years!

And there are a lot of you to thank.

Facebook lets me track the demographics of my fan base, and according to their metrics, 15% of my Facebook fans are women. That’s almost 30,000 of you! That’s pretty amazing, especially considering a lot of people people think women don’t have any interest in gay porn. But let’s face it: straight porn is typically made for men. The focus is definitely on the actress, and some studios exploit gender inequality by unfortunately objectifying rather than humanizing the women in their films. (Not all straight porn, though… check out the ethical porn movement.) By contrast, I’ve heard that gay porn can appeal more to women, as the focus is more on the scene in general than one person plus some moving parts. Plus, as was once explained to me by one of my straight female fans, “I’m attracted to guys… so why wouldn’t I want to watch for the price of one?” (Dirk and I spoke to Hannah Reilly about women’s interest in gay porn on the Australian radio station triple j… here’s the audio if you’re interested.)

Interestingly, our female fan base jumped from about 6% to a whopping 11% back in October of 2013 with the release of Andrew Grey‘s gay romance novel, Inside Out. J.P. Barnaby, a famous author of gay romance fiction herself, suggested to Andrew that I could be a good model for the cover of his new book; he then reached out to me and I happily agreed, not realizing that it would introduce me to an amazing new fan base. Since then, Dirk has appeared on the sequel to Inside Out called Upside Down, and we recommended a friend of ours who modeled for the cover of the third book in the series, Backward. We’ve appeared on the covers of several other well-known authors too, like K.C. Wells — whom Dirk advised on her best-selling novel First — and Kaye P. Hallows, with whom we’re long overdue for dinner!

A large percentage of GayRomLit fans are women, and over the years we’ve met many of the wonderful ladies who enjoy homoerotic fiction. Thank you, J.P. and Andrew, for introducing Dirk and me to all of those amazing people who we’re ever so proud to call our fans!

So, once again, Dirk and I would like to express our eternal gratitude for all those incredible women out there whom we’ve chatted with at events and appearances, on the Facebook page, on Twitter, or here on the blog. We’re so, so grateful for your support! Thanks to all 30,000 of you!

Johnny Parker, J.P. Barnaby, Dirk Caber, and me at Hamburger Mary's in Kansas City

Johnny Parker, J.P. Barnaby, Dirk Caber, and me at Hamburger Mary’s in Kansas City

Get your American flag PRIDE pin now to benefit two great charities!

It’s time for another charity pin sale… click here to get one for $10 and support two great charities! Details below.

Dirk and I are once again selling these sweet American flag pride pins for $10 each at jack.mn/flagpin, with 100% of the proceeds going to two very deserving charities (more on that in a moment). Free shipping to anywhere in the United States! We’re happy to announce that we’re able to offer international shipping now, too… just $3 flat rate to Mexico or Canada and $6 to anywhere else in the world. Only 30 are available and they go fast, so don’t wait!
What charities are we supporting?

We’re doing something a little different this time: you get to choose at check-out which charity your donation goes to! The first option is The Trevor Project, which provides crisis intervention and suicide prevention services to lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, and questioning young people ages 13-24. You can read about them at thetrevorproject.org… Dirk and I have supported them in the past and have found them to be an important and deserving charity.

There’s a bit of a story behind why we chose the Harm Reduction Coalition for our second charity. As some of you know, Dirk and I were present on a recent Atlantis cruise on which one of our fellow passengers, a man named Joel Taylor, died of an apparent drug overdose. We were deeply saddened by this tragedy — we’d met Joel before and have several mutual friends — but we were also dismayed by the lack of harm reduction services available on the ship. At the events we’ve worked at in Europe and Australia, Dirk and I often saw highly-visible, trained medical personnel ready to administer emergency care for those in crisis in a caring and non-judgemental environment. They were also able to provide resources and contacts in case people want to receive longer-term assistance. We believe we need more of that kind of interventional care, especially here in America where we can’t seem to get our sticks out of our asses when it comes to drug use. That’s why we’ve chosen the Harm Reduction Coalition to benefit from this sale. The 501(3)c organization advocates for public reforms that promote the health and dignity of those impacted by drug use, and offers harm reduction training for professionals who serve the LGBTQ community. And we can’t think of a better charity to raise money for in Joel’s name.

Remember, you get to choose at check-out which charity you’d like your donation to support. There’s a third option as well: you can choose to have your donation split evenly between the two charities. But no matter which one you choose, you’ll be glad to know that your money is going to a very worthy cause… or two!

Thank you for reading… now head on over to jack.mn/flagpin and get yours before they’re gone!

Jesse and Dirk

Video: Dirk blows a big horn at last year’s National Equality March

I just came across this video of my hubby Dirk Caber performing in Washington, D.C. with the Lesbian and Gay Big Apple Corps as part of last year’s National Equality March. I hope I get to join him next year… not only is visibility so important, the march looks like a heck of a lot of fun.

You can find Dirk starting at the 2:40 mark:

By the way, does anybody else notice the iPhone cable coming out of his kilt pocket? I asked him about it, and he says it’s because he had two pieces of his music on his phone instead of printed out. I dunno, though… I think he was live-tweeting.

Thank you to the excellent blog JoeMyGod for posting this video. We love Joe!